You Knew Didn't You?
by ItWasEpicAndILol'd
Summary: Roxas-centric poem. Revolves around question if Axel knew what would happen, happen. **Sorry for sucky summary**


_Standard DiZclaimer Apples _

_**~358/2 Days Spoilers if you haven't played it yet. (Because some people still haven't :P) Listen to the song 'Who Knew' By P!nk While reading if you can~**_

_**I = Roxas**_

_**You/he = Axel**_

_**She = Xion**_

_~"Maybe…maybe we really do have hearts," _

_Demyx~_

※↖∴↗※

I wanted it to last forever,

Us being together

Me and my two best friends

The sunsets

The Clock Tower

The Sea-salt Ice cream

He knew better

But still…

"_We'll be together as long as we have our memories"_

At the time I thought he was just being corny

So I forgot the conversation

And went on with my life

But then….

"_I…I feel like I know you but…I can't remember"_

I remembered that day on the clock tower

And his answer

And it made me wonder…

It made me wonder if he knew this would happen

If he knew that…

If he knew then why?

I decided to find my own answers

"_You get on their bad side and they'll destroy you!"_

Maybe being destroyed would have been better than this

My…friend… (?)

...She (?) is dead, things can never go back to the way they were,

Why should we even try to pick up our broken pieces?

It'd be easier to just leave

And begin anew

"_That's not true! …I would…_

And I swore a silent oath when I left

I swore I'd never forget you

That I'd cherish your memory

Until we met again

But then…

I forgot again

"_Man, talk about blank with a capital B"_

I should've realized…

Realized that the echoing feeling in my chest…

…It was my memories of our time together

When you visited me…

I thought about it for days

It plagued my mind

It haunted my dreams

"_C'mon don't you remember me? It's me, you know…Axel!"_

I wish I could remember

But I gave up your memory for answers

If I could still call you 'friend'

I would give up everything!

If I knew this was going to happen…

But I should've seen…

"_Roxas. Alright. Fight, fight, fight!"_

I should've seen your hidden message when you were telling me to fight,

Fight for my memories,

Fight for my existence

Fight for my true friend

But I didn't.

And I went on with my fake existence

"_Oh so you really do remember me this time! Well I'm __**SO FLATTERED!**__But it's too late!"_

If…

If you knew

If you told me…

If you trusted me with the real truth

If you never lied to me

If you stopped me

If you came with me

If you never let me forget

Then maybe it wouldn't have been to late…

"_I-I wanted to see Roxas, he…he was the only one I liked. He made me feel…Like I had a heart…"_

I never wanted this…

I never wanted you to die for me

I never wanted to kill her…

I never wanted to actually leave…

I never wanted to forget

I never wanted to lose my existence

I never wanted _any _of this!

But that's what happened…

"_Well, that's what happens when you put your entire being into an attack..."_

But maybe…

…Maybe…

Maybe things could have been different…

Maybe we'd still be eating ice cream on that clock tower

Maybe we'd still be laughing at the different ways to anagram the other Nobodies names

Maybe we'd still be making fun of Xemnas and Saïx

Maybe I'd still be mad at you for pushing me off the tower

Maybe you'd still be laughing at how you pushed me off the tower

Maybe we'd still be staring at the sunset

Maybe we'd still be watching that little tram car going back and forth

Maybe we'd still be watching those kids play

Maybe I'd still be asking you questions about the Organization

Maybe we'd still be talking about our missions

Maybe she would still be staring at her feet

Maybe you'd still be rubbing the back of your head

Maybe I'd still be staring at the sunset smiling.

Maybe I'd still trust you

Maybe…

Maybe sometime in the future we'll meet again in a pleasant memory…

But now…

"_Let's meet again in the next life,"_

Now we don't have mouths to eat with, and the ice cream is melted

Now everyone else is gone and there's nothing left to laugh at

Now Xemnas and Saïx aren't fit to be laughed at

Now I'm mad at you for worse reasons than pushing me off the tower

Now it's not so funny anymore

Now the sunsets are never the same

Now the tram car has reached its final destination

Now the kids aren't playing, and we never saw them again

Now I don't have to ask you questions

Now there are no more missions

Now she's gone…or she never really existed

Now you don't have to rub the back of your head, since there's nothing left for you to worry about

Now I can't smile

And I can barely remember her

Now…I don't think I can ever trust you again…

"_Silly, just because you have a next life…"_

All that only brought up the question

You knew all along that this would happen…didn't you?

And I think you knew we wouldn't be 'together forever'…

I think you knew that no matter how beautiful a sunset is it always has to set

Didn't you?

If you knew then why'd you have to keep leading us on so much?

If you knew then why did you keep rubbing salt in the wound?

If you knew we could never go back then why…?

Why did you keep trying to make things better?

Why did you keep trying to get me to come back?

Why did you make us think everything would be fine?

Did you know?

Because I think you knew…

You did know…didn't you?

※↖∴↗※

_A/N: Oh god…*Goes cry in emo-corner* …anyway…T^T all the italics were quotes from the game…though I kinda tweaked some of them a bit…. Oh and the two question marks when he was talking about Xion about her being his friend and a "she". They were there because he doubted himself…since he didn't even remember her and all that…. And…the underlined line was my favorite line :D and the first quote about the memories and all that got me thinking about this in the first place :3_

_Also thought about when I was listening to 'Who Knew by P!nk' and then 'Reach by Eyes Set to Kill' and 'Make It Stop (September's Children) by Rise Against' …Reach and Make it Stop are some fricking awesome songs btw…you should listen to them…Just sayin' (: Hope you enjoyed this little thing that I used to procrastinate from updating my other fics XD_

_Also thank you to Akuroku luvr…for being awesome and for actually encouraging me to get started on CoaM…sure it's just an outline…but an outline is the spine of a fic correct? :D_

_Rambleramblerambleramble _

_:D_

_Also sorry no Akuroku or implied Akuroku…or implied anything for that matter…_

_:3_

_Though maybe you can see it…if you squint…I can't though…): …The "F" word kinda got rid of the pairings I think... _o (F word = Friends) XD_

…_One more thing…_

_**DISGAEA 4! I WILL OWN YOU! :D:D:D:D:D …**_

…_that is all…. (EEeeeeeeEEeEEEEEeeee I can't wait for it to come out! :D:D:D:D)_


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